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Royal Review
By Victor Ludorem
Hello sports fans. Sorry to keep you waiting for this installment, this is a most busy time around here preparing for the SuperBowl and beta-testing our new site. Things have been happening at break-neck speed. There was no real pigskin action of interest to report last week, so sit back and relax in your Hollywood director’s chair, and let me relate how it is to live in Curacao and work at Royal Sports.
Curacao, a Dutch colony located on an island 30 miles north of Venezuela, is a land of many colors. A multi-ethnic blend of people of every shade, peacefully coexisting amid a Gauguin palette of verdant foliage and technicolor sunsets. An island of wooden shoes and tall blond women where the currency is guilders which come in different monopoly colored denominations. The Dutch currently enjoy one of the strongest economies in the world. Though geographically situated in the Caribbean, European influences are found in architecture, banking and cuisine. We have the longest runway in the Caribbean, the deepest harbor in the northern hemisphere, and over 100 offshore banks all to promote commerce. The see-through blue waters and white sand beaches contrast the red tile roofs and the carnival of pastel colored buildings. Jacques Cousteau’s wet dreams languish in the multi-colored tropical fish and coral formations that make up our marine life. The weather is without a doubt the finest in the world, partly cloudy between 78-82 degrees year round. Admitedly sometimes I feel like Bill Murray in ‘GroundHog Day’ where everyday you wake up it is the same, but if you have worldclass same’old, same’old it’s not too hard to take. A fabulous golf course, beautiful beaches, wonderful restaurants and plenty of Amsterdam-style nightlife make for adventures rivaled only in ‘PeeWee’s Big Top’. Practically all of our colleagues who work for other books here on the island share the sense of friendly competition, foreign to most North American ideology and share in a close bond reminiscent of the boys on the train tracks in ‘Stand By Me’. An appreciation for the camaraderie of sharing ideas and stories is unique to our island home.
The spirit of Royal Sports is manifested through the efforts of 130 Royal family members. Every department is staffed with hand picked professionals. If they had sexual harassment here it would be Reverse sexual harassment. You should see what these girls where to work! Did you ever hear of a ‘BusinessBikini’? Me neither till I got here. It’s OK to wear bikinis at Royal as long as they are not still wet. There are several beauty pageant winners in our family and rumor has it as long as there is a Miss Curacao Contest each year, there will always be fresh talent at Royal. We office in three historical buildings right on the ocean nearby downtown Willemstad. We have armed guards outside who orchestrate a team of car washers who charge 5 guilders per car. Most cars never get a chance to get dirty in the Royal parking lot. We anxiously await the daily FedEX packages to wash ashore just like in ‘Castaway’. Right now we are making preparations for the Royal SuperBowl Party which begins just after the second half kicks off. Win, lose or draw we have all worked hard to provide a solid, safe and entertaining place for your sports-gaming pleasure. A sincere thanks to all of those who over the years have become Loyal to Royal and a special thanks to those new accounts who helped poor Victor earn a few extra days off. Here’s hoping you have a fun and profitable time watching the SuperBowl wherever you may be..
By Victor Ludorem
Hello sports fans. Sorry to keep you waiting for this installment, this is a most busy time around here preparing for the SuperBowl and beta-testing our new site. Things have been happening at break-neck speed. There was no real pigskin action of interest to report last week, so sit back and relax in your Hollywood director’s chair, and let me relate how it is to live in Curacao and work at Royal Sports.
Curacao, a Dutch colony located on an island 30 miles north of Venezuela, is a land of many colors. A multi-ethnic blend of people of every shade, peacefully coexisting amid a Gauguin palette of verdant foliage and technicolor sunsets. An island of wooden shoes and tall blond women where the currency is guilders which come in different monopoly colored denominations. The Dutch currently enjoy one of the strongest economies in the world. Though geographically situated in the Caribbean, European influences are found in architecture, banking and cuisine. We have the longest runway in the Caribbean, the deepest harbor in the northern hemisphere, and over 100 offshore banks all to promote commerce. The see-through blue waters and white sand beaches contrast the red tile roofs and the carnival of pastel colored buildings. Jacques Cousteau’s wet dreams languish in the multi-colored tropical fish and coral formations that make up our marine life. The weather is without a doubt the finest in the world, partly cloudy between 78-82 degrees year round. Admitedly sometimes I feel like Bill Murray in ‘GroundHog Day’ where everyday you wake up it is the same, but if you have worldclass same’old, same’old it’s not too hard to take. A fabulous golf course, beautiful beaches, wonderful restaurants and plenty of Amsterdam-style nightlife make for adventures rivaled only in ‘PeeWee’s Big Top’. Practically all of our colleagues who work for other books here on the island share the sense of friendly competition, foreign to most North American ideology and share in a close bond reminiscent of the boys on the train tracks in ‘Stand By Me’. An appreciation for the camaraderie of sharing ideas and stories is unique to our island home.
The spirit of Royal Sports is manifested through the efforts of 130 Royal family members. Every department is staffed with hand picked professionals. If they had sexual harassment here it would be Reverse sexual harassment. You should see what these girls where to work! Did you ever hear of a ‘BusinessBikini’? Me neither till I got here. It’s OK to wear bikinis at Royal as long as they are not still wet. There are several beauty pageant winners in our family and rumor has it as long as there is a Miss Curacao Contest each year, there will always be fresh talent at Royal. We office in three historical buildings right on the ocean nearby downtown Willemstad. We have armed guards outside who orchestrate a team of car washers who charge 5 guilders per car. Most cars never get a chance to get dirty in the Royal parking lot. We anxiously await the daily FedEX packages to wash ashore just like in ‘Castaway’. Right now we are making preparations for the Royal SuperBowl Party which begins just after the second half kicks off. Win, lose or draw we have all worked hard to provide a solid, safe and entertaining place for your sports-gaming pleasure. A sincere thanks to all of those who over the years have become Loyal to Royal and a special thanks to those new accounts who helped poor Victor earn a few extra days off. Here’s hoping you have a fun and profitable time watching the SuperBowl wherever you may be..